Tuesday 29 September 2015

September Summary

Puling out your get psyched mix tape like
Good day people of the blogisphere.  I am currently sitting in my bed, pajama clad, listening to my 'morning vibes' spotify playlist  (some would call it my very own Barney Stinson-esque get psyched mix).  This playlist is particularly fun because, despite it's name, I have listened to this selection of music at just about every time of day imaginable bar mornings.  Anyway, it's 11.30pm and my morning vibes are plentiful all thanks to this strong, select community of songs.  It has also just occurred to me that in less than an hour it will be the last day of September and this has led to take a long, hard look into the pond of reflection.  
Let the reminiscence begin.

September began with me drowning in a deep swamp of post New York depression.  A depression that could only be cured by spending money that I was supposed to be saving on clothes, boots and fun new stationary.  Myself and B had come to the conclusion that the only way we were going to survive the fiery pit of hell that is our university was to go into the new academic year feeling fierce, fun and fashionable.  We were going to go into the year as new people!  Then when the old faithful bus pulled up at the university bus stop on the dreaded first day back and we were forced to accept our cruel fate and sulk our way to the lecture theatre and fight the overwhelming desire to off ourselves we could take one look in the mirror and at least pretend that we were sophisticated, well put together young ladies.  My return from holiday also resulted in my return to work which brought about a strange turn of events:  I turn on the CD player one day because music is fun, therapeutic and because I wanted to and it just happened to be a Frank Sinatra CD that was in the machine... before I knew it the Frank Sinatra obsession of September twenty fifteen began #StrangersInTheNight.
Wish I could leave today to be a part of it

Shopping filled the void well and kept me from staring at pictures of New York/Watching absolutely any film or TV show set in that marvelous, beautiful city of dreams whilst crying into my Laduree napkins and rolling around in a pile of my New York City attraction tickets which I had kept as souvineers.  However, shopping can only solve so much and when shopping had done everything it could it was time to move on to the next method... Alcohol.  It was time to assemble The Whale Wankers (for new readers: the whale wankers is both a potential name for Sea World employees considering what the devastating and eye opening masterpiece of film Blackfish revealed about certain tasks they are required to undertake as servers of Satan and the name of the squad which consists of myself, B, L and S... It's a long story... when S isn't around we become The Taymoms #simples).  The Whale Wankers met for cocktails and clubbing.  
The Whale Wankers

Queen G and B after spotting The Calvin Harris
When we checked the drinks menu the first thing that caught my eye was what some would call destiny!  A drink called The Calvin Harris.  Now anyone who knows anything about The Whale Wankers knows that Calvin Harris is a deity to us.  We want to be him, we want to be with him, we want to take him home to meet our mothers...  Predictably 4 'Calvin Harris's' were purchased and then following that 2 more cocktails were purchased each (for myself they were The CrayCray and The Basic Beach but The Calvin Harris was abundantly better than everything that followed it, naturally).  After cocktails we went to the club and we danced all night because when in Rome.  S decided to stay at the club after we left, B fell asleep in the taxi and L and I (in said taxi) went to the McDonald's drive thru where I quizzed the employee on his knowledge of current BBC newsreaders (namely Fiona Bruce #MyHero).  I was most unimpressed about his knowledge and as soon as the transaction was complete we got the hell out of dodge and back to our flat.  We tried to get the taxi driver to keep B because she was asleep and only the strong survive in this friendship but he said it was against the Taxi Driver rules/laws/code of conduct.  L and I sat and gorged on deliciously disgusting fast food while watching Gossip Girl (L watched while I talked over the whole episode about how much I love Chuck Bass and Leighton Meester) and then I "woke a human being" (a phrase I chose to repeat over and over again in a whole lot of snapchat videos to B and L) to retrieve my Ed Westwick cardboard cut out from the room said human being was sleeping in #noregrets.  
Family Goals
A few days passed and then before I knew it, too soon, my alarm sounded to inform me that the summer was officially over and uni was back in business.  The first week flew by considering I was only in class for 2 days.  On those days I was told I looked "sophisticated" "older" "pretty" and I was complimented on my new Kate Spade bag from New York, my Miss Selfridge coat and on how fun my summer holiday looked (from the Facebook pictures of course).  
When you have to go back to university 
Team Gossip Squirrel 
After uni started back the weeks became a routine of uni Monday-Thursday, Friday off, working 12 hours on Saturday and Sunday.  In between this monotonous, dull, drab, struggle of survival we found time to attend a pub quiz which was hella fun -more alcohol was consumed except this time in sensible amounts and we came 6th overall which I think was a not bad effort for our first time.  I also managed to get through a crazy amount of How I Met Your Mother and have become absolutely addicted, which will probably result in a noticable reduction in productivity in post class studying but as I always say: when in Rome.  And you know what they love to do in Rome?  Watch How I Met Your Mother (probably because who would love to do that?).  Anyway, September has drawn to a strong and steady end as Leighton Meester's baby's birth was confirmed, Taylor Swift continued to dominate the charts, the world and my heart, cats still exist and are still 100% fluffy, the sun has returned to Scotland, I finished reading the first Sisterhood Of The Travelling Pants book, I've been making soup, Scream Queens finally aired and  Fiona Bruce returned to my screen looking as Olivia Benson/Veronica Hastings/Eleanor Waldorf as ever.  

My plans for October are to join the gym, finally settle on a Halloween costume (it's between Holly Golightly because I love Audrey Hepburn and plus cat or Wednesday Addams because thats fun and why not?), pay back my parents, host the Halloween party of the century, make a start on my dissertation and most importantly stay fun, fierce and funky.  

On a side note I finished reading Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty in September and it was so good and I think you should all read it! 

The moral of the story is you can't win a participation award if you're not willing to participate.

Xoxo
Queen G

And for reference here are a list of songs that have played in my Morning Vibes playlist as I've composed this blog post:
Young Blood - The Naked And Famous
I Want You Back  - Jackson Five
Magnets - Lorde and Disclosure 
You Make My Dreams - Daryl Hall and John Oates
Yes Sir, I Can Boogie - Baccara
Weight of Living part 2 - Bastille
What Do You Mean? - Justin Bieber 
Blue - Marina And The Diamonds
All My Love - Ariana Grande and Major Lazer
Pumpin Blood - NONONO
Midnight Movies - Saint Motel
Something Stupid - Robbie Williams and Nicole Kidman
Tongue Tied - Grouplove
Marvin Gaye - Charlie Puth and Meghan Trainor
American Pie - Don McLean

Friday 18 September 2015

8 Things That Happen When You Go On Holiday With Your Best Friends

It feels like just yesterday that summer was starting, I was venturing down to London to see T Swizzle, the light of my life, perform live and I was working the weeks away desperate for the end of August to come so that I could finally go on holiday with B and L!  Well believe it or not that holiday came and went and I have been back in miserably, glacial Scotland - chilled to the bone even underneath my new pink Miss Selfridge coat!

Anyway  I returned from America tanned, bankrupt and enlightened!  Here are some of the things that I learned about going on holiday with your friends/here is my American summer blog post.  Fasten your seat belts kids, it's going to be a wild ride!
Concrete jungle where dreams
are made of!
My fave view in NYC
L, B and G with Libby



1- There will be a holiday catch phrase.
Then I said "what about Breakfast At
Tiffany's?"
Our alarm sounded early on the morning of our flight and we journeyed to the airport via tram.  After checking in, heading through security and browsing the shops aimlessly trying to pass the time we finally boarded the plane.  I personally do not care much for plane food - although United airlines may have converted me - yet when the trusted copilot announced the dining options for us (they must have been short of important jobs for him to do that night, bless!) I decided that I would in fact order a meal!  I turned to Lesley and uttered the phrase " when in Rome"  in an ever so matter of fact kind of way and just like that a legend was born.  Suddenly we could do absolutely anything we wanted to do on our trip as long as it was justified with "When in Rome!".  Some would argue that this catch phrase lived and died on the outward journey but I will continue to campaign to make it one of our group's many motto's!


Where Queen B
buys her headbands

Furthermore, the first week of our holiday was spent in Tulsa, Sweet Home Oklahoma - the sooner State, the Paris of Oklahoma some would say!  We stayed at B's house with her family, her mother - who's name is R; she is kind; she is smart; she is important and her hair is attractively arranged - does not condone cussing in any form (she's a classy lady!) which lead to many an utterances of "Oh my Goddddd-ness!"   Ultimately we ended up adopting "oh my goodness" as our own little saying and if one person said it then the other two would chime in and repeat it in a very Annie(1982)-esque kind of fashion!  

2 - Safety?
OU - The day we almost
died!
Maybe it was the overpowering liberty and justice that encompassed us 24/7 while we were in the states?  Maybe it was all the freedom in the air? Whatever it was it had taken ahold of B one day when we embarked on a perilous quest to visit her brother at OU.  It all started when she decided to change lanes on the highway without checking her mirrors first (that old chestnut) and this almost led to us becoming a statistic.  However, on the journey back to T-town things escalated!  B got lost and all she knew was that we had to head left because that was the direction of her house, she kept driving left but you see the problem with her logic was that she had somehow forgotten that a huge river runs through the middle of her home state.  Anyway, we turned left over a railway crossing and immediately knew that this had been a wrong turn, B circled around and the next event happened so fast!  She started driving down the railway tracks and I exclaimed "what the hell are you doing!?  Get back on the road!!!" *points at the road*.  Luckily (and B claims she knew this all along) the railway line was out of use and we safely made it back onto the road.  

We weren't safe for long...



We went from small road, to smaller road, to dirt road, to dirt track, heading left all the time!  We ended up in a place that would be more accurately described as a compound than an apartment complex.  There were warning signs on the gates explaining that fire arms were prohibited on the property,  people stared at us, I was certain we were going to die.  We got the hell out of there as fast as we could, L's request to stop to get a photo denied.  We eventually made it back to a real road and a huge bridge which lead us safely across the Arkansas river... back home and tucked up safely in bed by 10.30pm.



3 - Someone will get injured
It was worth the blood,
sweat and tears.
I guess this one links in to the above point in many ways.  We ventured down to Texas for the weekend to spend a fun filled day at Six Flags theme park, this was great because the Texas and Oklahoma welcome centers provided many a great photo ops!  The problem was that simply standing beside the Texas sign or duck facing beside the Oklahoma sign was, in the words of Cyrus Rose: not enough!  We had to climb!  On the great climb of the Oklahoma sign 2k15 L managed to injure her leg when it connected with some amount of force with the brick sign.  Classic L.  



Magic, madness, heaven and sin!

On our last night in Oklahoma we once again threw safety out the door and welcomed many an opportunity for injury.  We went night swimming and let me tell you this: hypothermia wasn't the only danger lurking near by!  The three of us suffer from a sickness where we need to push things just one step too far.  There was attempts to recreate dirty dancing lifts and professional cheer moves.  There were challenges to see if we could jump onto the huge Taylor Swift #swangoals inflatable swan landing on our feet.  We tried to do an immeasurable amount of less than safe things and its a wonder that the most serious injury was only a slightly sore neck or back.



4 - I'll live off of water and sunshine!
Okay so we said a big goodbye to Oklahoma and an extremely enthusiastic hello to New York City.  New York was the most amazing place that I had ever been and there was an unfathomable number of things to see and do...  This made for the most outstanding holiday ever however all the glitz and glamour and shops and tours and pollution was very distracting and often lead us to forget to stop for food or sleep.  Often we remembered the importance of hydration however the early starts often lead to a missed breakfast and then on the way to lunch we would discover something wonderfully fun to do and before we knew it was dinner time and we had only eaten a sandwich, if anything, and this paired with 12+ miles of walking was probably not helping us achieve our daily recommended calorie intake.  Sometimes you are just having too much fun to stop and
consider if you are fulfilling all of your basic survival needs every day - I was living off of fun and excitement.  I was in love with New York City.  The big city life style had energized me and had filled me to the gunnels so that food was often a passing thought... until one day it all became too much!
Urban Outfitter's offers so much
entertainment
Candid shot in Urban


Oh My God
goodness, look at that face

5 - down in flames




A sad attempt at a smile by myself
Unfortunately you can only survive off of fun, excitement, water and sunshine for so long before you become vexed and irritable.  A few days from the end of our holiday a combination of a lack of sustenance and a deep desperation for our New York trip to not end led to a few bouts of bickering between the Taymoms (thats the name of our group due to our deep admiration of Taylor Momsen, when we add S to the group our name becomes The Whale Wankers but lets move on from that).  It was the deep desire for a wonderful sandwich and the fact I had reached the end of my tether on the bus tour after the tour guide decided to treat us to his one man comedy show jokes 6+ times (per joke) during our journey that led to the huge Queen G downfall of 2015.  There was the clear annoyance expressed towards B and L on the long walk to the museum as fuel was added to the deep fire of rage burning away inside of me.  Then there was the ignoring, the snapping and storming off in the food hall, the secluding, the missing out on the entirety of the Natural History Museum due to tantrum and then ultimately the tears in central park afterwards.  I look back on this day fondly! #noregrets.  That was a lie, I have many regrets.

Then there was the time that to L's horror we left on 30 minutes early for Wicked when the walk took 20 minutes!  The tensions were running high from fears of being late and missing it.  L raced on ahead like a boat against the current.  In protest I trailed behind and got stuck at almost every stop light imaginable.  I befriended a lost Northern Irish couple and passive aggressively told them how I had been left behind by my friend.  The pair of lost lambs had sought me out when then mistook me for a New York local (probably due to my cool exterior and my look of ease as i strutted down the streets).  Initially they had looked disappointed when I told them I was not from New York however when my natural talent for directions came into play and I was able to point them in the right direction to the theater they were eternally grateful.  It's so lucky that I have such a great sense of directions, and that we happened to share a final destination!  B came back for me and we arrived at the Gershwin theater to find that L was not there.  I instantly assumed that she had gone in without us with our tickets and that we would therefore miss the show!  Things looked bleak and friendships were about to be cut off even though B was certain that L wouldn't do that to us.  Suddenly L appeared looking like an angry bull who was seeing red and we went inside.  Before long basic civil conversation started and then in no time all was forgiven right in time of the start of the first song.

I cant pick a fave!
B and L like Glinda best























#SiblingGoals
Throughout the last few days of the trip there were a handful of classic sibling bickering events (99% between myself and L) over everything and anything from post uni expeditions, living arrangements, directions, our 4th year club of choice... you name it, we bickered about it just enough to drive B to insanity.  But fear not loyal readers, this did not dent our friendship at all!  She is still the Serena to my Blair, the heart to my ocean...

6 - Make good choices?
So we went on a day of shopping towards the end of our holiday because when in Rome!  We didn't even think twice about spending over $100 on headbands or necklaces or over $200 on handbags and yet even when it came to the dark days mentioned above when the tensions were running high due to hunger we deeply begrudged spending over $10 on a sandwich...  Classic!

 7 - New vibes, good energy
The best Macaroons in town
One thing that certainly happened on our holiday was that we reflected a lot on what we were like back home in Scotland and we realized how many of the fun activities we had done in New York (such as going for Macaroons from Laduree or visiting cute cafes or nice restaurants) could be recreated, to an extent, back home in Edinburgh.  One of the things that really made us unhappy about returning home was the fact that we didnt want to have to stop having fun or dressing nicely.  We realized that we could still wear nice clothes or do something, anything really, other than Netlflix  (#netflixandchill?) every day!  

The Highline park
We thought a lot about how we wanted to spend our time back home and we decided we would be more outgoing and actually try to plan to participate in different activites.  We could still wear nice clothes as long as we added fun tights, coats and boots to prevent us dying from the cold.  The holiday was ending but the fun could continue if we just put in a bit of effort.  In the words of some random stranger on the Highline Park we just needed to share "good positive energy and feel the good vibes"

 8 - It's gonna be forever
Our last day in NYC. Rowboats. recreating Chuck and
Blair's wedding, Central Parking it up
Most importantly the three of us grew closer than ever.  We now have so many new fun memories together, an abundance of pictures and videos to get us through the dark winter days in the university library.  Sitting bored and ready to blow my brains out in class I can think back to the Gossip Girl Tour, Blair Waldorfing it up on the Met steps.  Dancing around the streets compiling videos for our holiday music video.  Mucking around on Liberty Island.  Basking in the breathtaking view from Top Of The Rock - home of Jimmy Fallon.  Recreating the Blair and Serena photoshoot outside The Empire. We passed urine in the bathrooms of every fancy hotel we seen.  We ogled at everything that Dylan's Candy Bar had to offer.  We all bought expensive brightly coloured handbags, we strutted about central park and up and down all of the streets and avenues, the Taymoms owned that city and they left as the most sturdy friendship group that there ever was - strong and true.


The Empire Hotel bar (They sell a Chuck Bass
cocktail!)
#Viewgoals!

Finally 
Here is one last story before you go!
We boarded the plane in Newark airport at the end of our holiday, relieved to be on the plane after, for reasons I cannot fathom, United airlines managed to overbook our flight by 8 people.  They offered to put 8 people onto the next flight to Glasgow or Belfast (and unless Blefast was merely a stop off on the way to Edinburgh I fear that Americans have a slight knowledge gap of UK geography).  Luckily 8 heroes volunteered up their seets in exchanged for $300 worth of air miles.  Everyone was desperate to take off after the slight delay that this overbooking had caused and their was a shared sigh of relief when the safety video began to play and we taxied to the runway.

Suddenly the safety video stopped.

The captain announced that there was a  passenger missing from their seats and it was a federal offence to play the video without everyone seated and so we would have to wait for this person to return to their seat, hopefully this wouldn't delay take off further.  I asked L to confirm what the captain had said and she told me that we might be delayed because some idiot had gotten out of their seat.  Then the next thing we see is B hurrying back to her seat from the toilet.  Turns out B is such a frequent flier she had taken it upon herself to skip the video and go for a quick bathroom break before take off.  She had singlehandedly managed to completely embarrass herself and piss off everyone else on the plane all at once.  This of course proved very entertaining for L and I, almost as entertaining as my film of choice (Enchanted) which i thoroughly enjoyed!  That was probably the last enjoyable moment of the flight for L before the person on front of her decided to abuse her seat reclining powers and basically crushed L for the entirety of the journey. 
I volunteer as tribute
The Gossip Girl Tour! (Bendels, Constance Billard, The Empire, The Met steps and the famous B and S photoshoot!)

  
 The moral of the story is that you don't really know what you need until you don't have it!

xoxo
Queen G