Monday 27 April 2015

Family Reunion

I never claimed to be H2O intolerant 
Last week I returned home to see my family because I haven't been home in ages and my uncle was over visiting from Thailand. 
Basically at these events I always get a flareup of my over excitability and chronic word vomit which ultimately leads to me making a bit of a full of myself and people getting a little fed up when I channel my inner favourite Finding Nemo character -Obnoxious.  
Picture this:  I walk into the house and want to seem fun, friendly and sociable so I flash my winning smile, show off my easy grace with strangers family and launch into my first story of the night (which will always be something completely irrelevant, confusing or plain stupid - a nice foreshadowing of what is to come during the rest of the evening).  I'm sure the first story I told was about how the local shop had recently been robbed of all the meat and now they have hired a security guard to patrol the meat aisle - this story would be told in that classic over excited, high pitched, piercing voice of mine and then as the story ends it will be followed by laughter.  The laughter is there as a queue for everyone to start laughing, in a 'haha am I not just so funny?  Wasn't that story hilarious, please laugh, everything I say is hilarious!'
Spirit animal 


 Kind of way.  After a few fun opinions of the story are vocalised by the family I quickly launch into story 2, then 3 then 4 until someone asks how university is going or some other normal question along those lines.
Of course, when asked these questions I can't just reply with a simple: yes university is going fine thanks or something along these lines.  Rather, I need to tell the whole family about how "yes its fine but" and then tell them about every silly or stupid thing I've done or said that is university related - most of these stories wouldn't even be as bad if it wasn't for the way I tell them.  You see a fun fact about me is that when I tell a story I don't want to just state the facts!  Every story has to be an epic chronicle, an Oscar worthy adventure. 
I've never done this FYI.
Then worst of all is when the word vomit extends to story about nights out... My voice keeps piercing through the room, spitting out every alcohol related story as my brain desperately tries to catch up in time to make some edits to keep the stories more PG and so I don't ruin my pristine reputation.
Basically the night ends with my sister being annoyed and frustrated that she can't get a story out without (unintentional) interruption from me and she is basically sick of the sound of my voice, everyone else feels like they have just been drowning and they have now finally resurfaced and can breathe again and I feel a bit loopy and ready for round 2 - if not for the fact that I have a really sore throat now.  Basically everyone needs time to recover, and when they finally do it will be just in time for me to return to them once again.  

They don't call me the loquacious Queen B for nothing!

The moral of the story is that if I had been in that lifeboat there most definitely
 would have been room for one more because there is no way I would have been able to shut that hole in my face!
I'd be at the bottom of the ocean

xoxo
Queen G

Sunday 26 April 2015

Underrated Animated Characters

So I love films so much, I like most genres except for sci-fi.  I can't help but feel like some of the characters from my favourite animated movies are extremely underrated.  I mean I love some of the main characters in films as much as the next person but sometimes these characters get so much attention that more minor characters are completely overshadowed.  Here are some of the characters I think are underrated, under appreciated and just not given the love they deserve.

Poor fella
This hungry little dalmation from 101 dalmations.  This little guy is the definition of #relatable always trying to fill a bottomless pit, trying to quench a ruthless hunger, trying to wait for an absolution that would never come.  
And on the subject of 101 dalmations I think it is completely rude, uncouth and proof that theres not much justice in the world that Sergeant Tibbs is not given more credit for single-pawdedly saving 99 dalmation puppies from certain death at the hands of Cruella De Vil... I mean he was a cat, a CAT and he saved 99 puppies, he had 99 problems and they dogs were all of them!
Cat of the year


True Story
The shrimp from Shark Tale.  This little guy's sister died and left him with her baby and then all its arms and legs fell off and hes having to put extra shifts in at work just so he can afford to put food on the table!  Like either this shrimp is a 10/10 kind of guy or he's an incredible liars - either way he is inspirational and he could teach us a lot!



that's beautiful Sarah
Sarah from Horton Hears A Who seems to a little bit of an outsider.  A little too crazy and unpredictable to truly be accepted by her peers makes her a character close to my heart, she also has an amazing imagination and I'd love to visit her world any day!





He never even knew his father
Bruce the shark.  I mean this guy isn't completely underrated, I think most people like Bruce but I don't know if anyone really gave him enough credit!  He literally never knew his father and this has obviously been hard on him, something he could just never quite get over.  Further, he started a group to stop eating fish which would be a hella hard job for a Shark.  He probably had to overcome a lot of teasing and he probably never fit in during his childhood because he was the Shark who wouldn't eat fish.  Either that or he originally ate fish and then some event in his life awoke him and open his eyes to a whole new fishless life.  Either way, good on ya Bruce.

Lol what a joker
The albatross from The Rescuers.  What can I even say?  Like this bird flies the mice from New York to Australia in the second movie!! He has to undergo operations including nearly being operated on by a mouse with a chainsaw annnnnnd hes left to sit on the eagle eggs for like ever! and what appreciation does he get... like none!! He was a good sport

Shut your fat fucking mouth you little shit and show some appreciation

Yeah he took the red one
This guy from Lilo and Stitch doesn't even have a name but in his 5 seconds of fame you can genuinely feel his overwhelming disapointment when Stitch opts to steal the red spaceship rather than the blue one... poor guy!





He wasn't even carrying scissors and hand cream
Mort from Madagascar is picked on time and time again.  Julien didn't want him to come in the airplane so badly that he even told security that Mort was carrying scissors and hand cream in his carry-on!! This was lies!!!!! And then he was chased by a shark - on. dry. land.  And then of course there is the fact that he is just so darn cute!!! Definitely one of the best Madagascar characters, along with that old lady from New York who survived a hit and run and used her patriotism to save herself an the tour group from the wilds of Africa.


I was born in this hole...
This character was so underrated that they didn't even get a proper name but can we all just take a second out of our busy life's to take into consideration how lucky we are.  This poor little underrated hedgehog from Ice Age 2 is being asked to leave her lifelong home because of a meltdown... leading her to have a meltdown of her own!  She was born in that hole and she's going to die in that hole!!  

Just a dinosaur
Then there is that lonely dinosaur Trixie from the last Toy Story film.  She was looking for love in all the wrong places.  I hope she and Rex got together after the films ended and she stopped looking for dinosaurs online. 
Don't dothat to yourself Trixie, you have so much to offer, turn off that computer and go socialize, you'll find someone one day.  I guess I just feel her pain, forever alone.  It's ok Trixie, it's ok.  Maybe dying alone isn't as bad as it's made out to be.....

Woooppeeeeee
And finally, good old Uncle Waldo from The Aristocats - and actually his favourite gooses Abigale and Amelia.  Waldo was nearly cooked and served in a French restaurant and during this order he was not basted but marinated in white wine.  Abigale and Amelia on the other hand take time out of their day to try to help teach a cat how swim.  Uttering one of my favourite lines from the whole film: snip snip, here we go.  They are most definitely a fun filled family that brought a lot to this movie! I would love to know where the night took them after they left the cats.

I could go on and on, on and on but I wont.  That was just a small handful of characters that don't get enough love.  No Disney ride dedicated to Waldo - or any of the Aristocats characters actually, whats with that!!? 
And I'd like to give a little shout out to Mrs Potato head who was so considerate she even remembered to pack Mr Potato head's angry eyes - just in case. To the starfish from Nemo that was sold via Ebay, Mr Smee from Peter Pan... anyway I'll stop.

The moral of the story is love can touch just one time and last for a life time.

xoxo
Queen G  

Saturday 11 April 2015

Welcome To New York

Me and Sissy in the financial centre
So it's official, this summer L and I are going to take a ride on a big jet plane across the pond to visit B at her home in Tulsa then then the 3 of us are going to New York for a week!  This isn't happening until the end of August but I already cannot wait!  This also sparked off my memory about the last time I went to New York... the year was 2011 and I was blonde and brace faced (it was a dark time).  So I thought I would blog about my first trip to New York in keen anticipation of my upcoming return. Oh and this is probably not what you would expect...

So in 2011 we went to America and spent some time in San Diego, Vegas and then flew to Georgia.  We drove from Georgia up to New York and spent like 2 days there before flying home.  Back then I was allll about small town life and I just adored Georgia, Savannah was (as B would apparently say now) hella cute!  And when it came to big city life, nah that wasn't me at all.  We got to New York at night and fun fact: we stayed at the hotel where Man On A Ledge would soon be filmed, the Dictator started filming there on the day I was going home and it was also one of the filming locations for Maid In Manhattan (for all you big JLow fans out there, I myself prefer JLaw).   


There's always some idiot who goes "moo"
- Chandler Bing
The next day we got up bright and early wanting to make the most of our time in the place that Alicia Keys claimed would make me feel brand new and where Madonna told me she didn't like cities but she loved New York - I'd never much liked Madge but I was hoping she would be right about this one!  We got a hop on hop off bus pass and took to the concrete jungle where dreams are made of.  Our first stop was the Statue of Liberty, we got onto the boat and went to the top deck.  My mother and I watched the tour guys herd everyone else onto the boat and my mum began to make mooing noises and all I could think about was that episode of Friends where Monica and Chandler discuss this.  We decided not to get off the boat at the statue, which i guess is a little weird but my mother decided it looked the same from the boat as it would from the island.  We then went to the 9/11 memorial museum - the memorial itself was not built at this stage in time nor was the particular museum which I believe is there now.  After this we went to the financial center and I got some pizza. Then we waited at the bus stop for a lifetime only to see the bus drive right on by without stopping for us or the other tourists who had been waiting impatiently.  I had by this stage in the day lost about half my body weight in sweat and my hair resembled Monica Gellers in the Barbados episode.  

#RealLifeProbs

3 years later

Another bus came along and picked us up and we proceeded to take a bus tour.  The tour guide told us that once a lady tried to commit suicide by jumping off of the empire state building but the wind was so strong that she was blown back in through a window a few floors down... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empire_State_Building#Suicide_attempts
I don't really remember much else from the bus tour to be honest - like I said I wasn't a huge city fan back then and the only other thing I remember was the smell - it really did smell bad haha!
Me and A up the Empire State Building.
And my questionable outfit choice.
That night we went up the Empire State Building which was actually really cool although I would probably prefer to go during the day if I go up it again.  On the way back down the security/tour guy who worked the lifts tried to let my family into the lifts without me and my friend but mother - who is terrified of heights - asked to wait for the next lift with me because she didn't want to leave me up the top alone.  The guy was really rude to her and told her that no she would have to get into the lift and to stop causing hassle over nothing.  My mother said that she would not be leaving me up the top of the Empire State Building alone and that if he has to fill the lifts he can let someone else in in her place and ultimately he shouted "JESUS CHRIST!" at her and stormed off mumbling for the 3 of us to just get into the lift together.  This was not the first time we had encountered rudeness on this trip and it was at this moment I decided that I didn't like New York.  

The next day we decided to do some shopping and go to Central Park since it was the last day of our holiday.  We stopped in at Toys R Us in Times Square so I could pick up a gift for my friend - A New York themed duck soft toy.  I went in and asked the shop assistant where the soft toys were kept and she just stared at me and curtly remarked "Ugh a what!?" and I was like "sorry I don't know what you call them here, like a soft toy, a stuffed animal, a teddy bear except not a bear..." she continued to stare at me and then looked between her and her colleague clearly mocking me and half laughing, she just pulled a face.  I told her to never mind, I'd look myself and thanked her for all of her help using every bit of sarcasm I could muster.  I definitely hated New York.  I was never coming back!  
We found Wonderland
We walked to Central Park and spent an extremely long time trying to find the Alice In Wonderland statue - it was totally worth it though.  I really liked central park and wish we had spent more time there.  We went to see Chicago on Broadway that night and it was amazing!! 10/10!
When it was time to leave we were all excited to get out of that city once and for all.  We got to the airport and found out there had been a problem with our booking and we wouldn't be able to fly home on that flight.  After a while my mother managed to get us onto a flight that day - we were leaving one way or another!
Me, Mother and Sissy at Chicago

I swore I'd never return.

However, as time passed and I changed I fell back in love with the idea of New York.  I'm far less sensitive than I was when I was 16 and there is no way I would let someone else's rudeness impact me so much.  In fact I've learned to give what you get and I now know not to have any expectations from people and their attitudes.  
I mean not everyone in New York that I met was rude.  The shop assistants in Aeropostale and Bubba Gump's were very friendly as were the staff at the hotel.  I also love cities now and I am super excited to return to New York!
Honestly I'm glad I had this experience and my only regrets are that I had never watched Gossip Girl prior to this trip as they were most definitely filming while I was there #missedopportunity 

The moral of the story is that some people need to remember that they are a shark, not a mindless eating machine!


 
The chan chan man






       




        Xoxo
       Queen G






being one of those people


Friday 10 April 2015

Interview With My Flatmates The Sequel: Childhood

Okay so since the last interview I conducted on my flatmates didn't completely go down in flames I thought I would do another, this time on the subject of childhood.  In case you missed the first one I'll give you a brief introduction to the interviewees.  This time we have only L and B because J was not present at the time of interviewing sadly.  B and I were present and L was interviewed over the phone #21stCenturyPerks 

L and G
Firstly let me introduce L.  L wanted to provide a fun fact about herself which is as follows:  according to L she won a largest bulb competition when she was younger (although B and I both heard her say largest bowel competition...)*at this stage in the interview B is already causing havoc when she tells L over the phone that Nacho, one of our cats, has peed in L's underwear drawer (this was not true) an L freaks out, there was real anger in her voice* 



B and G
Next we have the mischievous B who did not provide her own fun fact because she was too busy ruining life's to do it so I'll provide my own fun fact about her... Once B tried to show off her mad Katniss Everdeen skills for me which resulted in her getting stuck up a tree.

The 3 best friends that anyone could have





Some fun facts about us as a collective trio - we have all met Kelly Clarkson, our favourite song is Singing In The Shower and we are partial to a Sunday morning 11am domino's pizza.





Let's commence with this interview now...

Q: What was your favourite childhood toy?
A:*Beth, most inconveniently needs to go to the bathroom at this moment in time*
(L)Ohhh my Baby Annabelle... I played with it, pretended it was my child and I had a fabulous life.  I also played with my Barbies a lot, same kind of scenario!  I was a very plan your life type of child sooo... 
(B)A lion... Called Leo...

Q: What was your favourite Halloween costume that you dressed up in as a child?
(B) I'd say Princess Leia... I was probably about 7 years old.  I looked hella cute though.  Hell-la-cute
(L)emm, well.  Emmm. *Beth snarkily inputs "let me guess, a doctor.  In the scrubs. and they were the comfiest Halloween costume you ever did have" (L always talks about this costume and how it was the definition of #comfortgoals)* No i was what's her face from The Flintstones, I want to say Velma?  Who's married to Fred in The Flintstones? *I tell her that Fred's wife will do because we can google the particulars when I'm typing this up but now I've decided that nah that aint me so we are leaving it at Fred's wife* And I was also a witch and my mum made my costume.  And I won! *B says "Yeah but I don't think you looked hella cute though!?" and I ask her if her costume was made out of a bin bag and she of course confirms it was so I decide to burst her bubble and tell her the kids in the homemade bin bag witch costume's always won costume competitions at my school too* 

Q: What was your favourite Christmas present you got as a child?
A: (L)emmm, well.  Oh I got my Baby Annabelle one year! *Me: OMG was your whole life based around this doll!!?"* No this doll, this doll now plays Jesus every year at my mums school's nativity, so it's a celebrity child!  No I got a tend one year so that was fun and I got a trampoline. *B: we used to have a tent and we loved it, we used to marinade in it!"*
(B) I was really jealous when my sister got a dressing table! So jealous!  But, it sounds really lame, but my personal favourite was, I got this chair for my room! *Laughs from Me and L*  It was hella cool! Hella cute too *I don't know where this saying came from...*

Q: What was the name of your best friend as a child?
A: (B) Her name was A____ and I saved her from drowning!
(L)*Has to be told that "I had a few best friends" is a lame answer and simply will not do* Mmmmm probably A_____ she was my first friend *me: was she imaginary?"* NO! she was real!  And in Primary 3 we had to write a story about a magic carpet and where we would travel on it and my class all said things like Disneyworld but I said A_____'s house *Laughs from B and me #lameeee*

Q: What were your nicknames as a child?
A: *Me: L was your's big fat goalie?* (L) I didn't have a nickname as a child. *Me: but was it big fat goalie?* It would have been if I had played football that's for sure! *B: chubba chubba*
*We all take a minute to revel in the discovery that L is Monica Geller in every way a person can be Monica Geller, then B and L get distracted talking about Billy the kid*

Q: What did you want to be when you grew up?
A: (L) emmm I wanted to be an actress at one point when I was really little! And then I wanted to be a lawyer for a really long time. *Me: did you never want to be anything magical!? B: like a princess*
(B)Emmm I wanted to be a shopkeeper for a while... and a writer *B quotes Moulin Rouge saying "a writa?" in hr best Nicola Kidman accent 10/10 for effort!" 
(L) Oh and also I wanted to be in S Club Junior! *B and I thought she was going to say an escort, which in hindsight would have been a more achievable goal*

Q: Give us a story about a time when you got in a lot of trouble!
A: (L) I got into trouble when my dad spent all day laying the bathroom floor but I didn't like it so I tore it up. *B and I get distracted talking about gastroenteritis and making up stories about L*

Q: What were you doing on November 7th 1996?
A: (L) emmmm probably asleep!
*Me: want to know what Lorde was doing?  She was being born!"*
(B) I was an Easter Sunday! The Lorde's day!

Q: Finally did you get any injuries as a child?
A:*B andL talking over eachother, classic them!
(B) Ohhh I broke my arm, my leg and early my finger! I fell in a fireplace, I fell off a windowsill, I was swung around by a skipping rope, I fell in a fire, I also broke my face *Probably a fire again?*
(L) I had a slide in my backgarder, my older brother suggested I got down on a sledge.  Long story short the sledge snapped when I got to the bottom *#BigFatGoalie* and the edge went into the top of my leg it was really really sore.  My brother got into a lot of trouble! *Me: that is so fun, being the older sibling is so much fun!*

L and B summed up their childhood with the words uneventful (from L) and not long enough (from B, which is not one word).  In summary, nobody know what they were doing on Lorde's birthday which I find very disrespectful and it is very difficult to interview these particular people.

Until next time
Xoxo
Queen G.


G and L as B and S

Dancin in the mirror, singin in the shower








10 Reasons Being A Cat Would Be Better Than Being A Person

Hey guys, so the time finally arrived when my two favourite boys, Harvey the type 2 diabetic kitty and Nacho the inconsistent litter tray user, returned to our apartment!  This was also the week I started on a work placement that required me to wake up at 5am Monday-Friday.  Over this week I thought a lot in the brief period of time between dinner and bed about how many of my problems would be eradicated if I was a cat like Nach and Harv!  Here are the top 10 reason's I'd rather be a cat right now than a real live human girl.


  1. No early morning wake up calls from your alarm.  When you're a cat you can sleep any time you want, anywhere you want.
  2. Low expectations - the only things people expect from you is for you to go to the bathroom in appropriate places (i.e the litter tray and now the kitchen floor Nacho!) and the occasional hug.
  3. You don't have to worry about being late because you don't have anywhere to be... another perk in itself, you don'y even have to leave the house if you don't feel like it.
    What I wouldn't give to stay home all day
  4. You don't have to make an effort with people when you're tired
  5. You don't have to make an effort with people you dont like
  6. You don't have to make an effort with people period.
    Cat's dont have to do that
  7. There is no countdown to the weekend or your next holiday because every day is a holiday
  8. You don't have to remember to take food out of the freezer because you get all of your food handed to you on a silver platter.  Or in a nice clean bowl at least.
    This is what Harvey looked like pre-diabetes
  9. You don't have to plan which meals you're going to have because you eat the same food every day. And you never seem to get bored of it.
  10. You have no money worries because you don't need to pay for your food, accommodation or anything else...
    Living it up for free
So you see, there really are a lot of perk of being a cute little fluffy feline!  I can't say I don't envy them and how easy their life seems to be.
The moral of the story is that everybody truly does want to be a cat because a cat's the only cat know knows where it's at!

xoxo
Queen G

Tuesday 7 April 2015

My Trip To Mystic Falls

Blonde G in Mystic Falls
So you might think that I have always been one thing, but I'm about to turn out to be the exact opposite (as 2006 Channing Tatum would say).  You may think that I have always been a die hard Gossip Girl fan but let me tell you, back in the day I was all about The Vampire Diaries... And luckily for me my obsession coincided perfectly with my holiday to America and guess where we were heading?  Georgia, home of Covington AKA Mystic Falls.
The first place we headed was a cute little shop to buy I Heart Damon Tshirts - naturally, and then we grabbed a Mystic Falls map.  
We walked around under the hot Georgia sun to visit Tyler's house, Caroline's House, Elena's house.. basically all of the houses.  Then we went to Scoops for ice-cream... well everyone else got ice cream but I'm too hipster for that so I got popcorn which is my fave snack.  The nice super Southern lady working the till informed us that the cast often stop buy for sweet snacks when they are in town filming but that they were currently out 
Elena's house - fun fact: it was
for sale when I was there.
of town at Comic Con in San Diego (3 guesses where we had just come from before Georgia?  Yes that's right, San Diego!  But guess who didn't get to go to Comic Con... me again.  The world is a fickle fickle place).

Then we stopped for some pictures on front of the famous clock tower were (Spoiler alert) Katherine Pierce made her famous suicide attempt of season 5.  And on front of the Mystic Grill where many a plate of fries have been served up by everyone's favourite blonde haired teddy bear - Matty blue blue.
I wonder if Matt is working?
Want to know another fickle truth of the world?  After Georgia we made our way to Gossip Girl town.  The year was 2011.  Gossip Girl was most definitley filming.  I had never seen Gossip Girl.  I could have witnessed an episode of Gossip Girl being filmed live but I was too lost inside a Gossip Girl-less world, unaware of the power of a simple xoxo.  Never mind thought because I'm returning to New York this summer with B and L (My real life Serena and Nelly - in the words of Uncle Waldo: Whoooopeeee)

**UPDATE** Since releasing this blog post it has been announced that Nina Dobrev will be leaving The Vampire Diaries.  This is heartbreaking in every way that something can be heartbreaking and I think I'll cry for 84 years!!  

Monday 6 April 2015

An Introduction To All Of My Pets Past And Present

Over the years I have owned a variety of different fun pets!  There have been dogs, cats, fish, ponies... However, despite what I may have said as a child to my friends, in hopes of sounding fun and unique, I most definitely did not own a snail that we had to get rid of because it bit me!
Here is a list of every pet I have ever owned and some fun facts about each!

Firstly I'll start with my 2 goldfish: Gold and Goldie.  I got them for Christmas one year, it felt like they lasted for a lifetime when in reality it was probably like a month.  I was convinced I could tell the two fish apart but let's be real... 
I literally have no pics of them

Now let's get to the serious real pets that I could actually bond with and build an emotional attachment to!
My parents owned 2 dogs called Benji and Sandy before I was born and they were still around when I came along.  Sandy would eat absolutely anything in sight, I think I take after him.  The day he died my mum sat over his body crying and I poked him in the eye just to be sure he was really dead.  Then I phoned my dad at his work and shouted down the phone "SANDY IS DEAD AND MUM IS CRYING AND I POKED HIM IN THE EYE BUT HE IS DEAD! REALLY DEAD!" Not exactly the best way to break bad news to someone.  The next day they buried him in the garden and when I ran outside to play I tripped over the slab he was buried under and burst my knee open...  Benji hung on longer, once in his old age, after he had become kind of incontinent, I picked something up off of the sofa telling my mum "I've never tried a truffle before!" She quickly advised not to eat it because it was in fact not a truffle I'll let you put 2 and 2 together... Close call.  
Me and Benji, around the time of
the truffle incident 
Benji and Sandy


























Me and sissy on Kipper
Next, before Benji departed this world, I got a Welsh pony called Kipper.  He was the light of my life!  We would go on adventures around our field - no hat, no saddle, no bridle because nah that aint me (much to my mothers dismay).  Literally every day was spent out in the field with Kipper, going on secret missions, learning how to jump, learning how to horse ride in general.  Eventually we moved Kipper to a riding stables and then when I turned 11 Kipper was passed down to my litter sister.  This was the most traumatic moment of my life - my parents gave my sister a card that read "Merry Christmas from your new pony Kipper" and I freaked the eff out, he was mine all mine!! We kept Kipper in our family until the day he passed away - way into his late 30s at least - from colic.
This is what most of my childhood looked like















My last day with Surprise
Continuing on from the Christmas story above... My parent's then gave me a card that Christmas which had a picture of a random Dun/Cream coloured pony which read "Merry Christmas from your new surprise pony" and I was so grateful but still heartbroken about Kipper until I reread it and realised that it actually read "Merry Christmas from Surprise, your new pony". Surprise was my favourite pony from the stables.  Her owner had outgrown her and noticed how much time I spent with Surprise - yes I was a lame preteen - and so offered her to my parents because they knew I'd look after her.  I've already written a whole blog about Surprise but here are a couple of fun facts - she was often mistaken for a boy which made me mad, once while out trekking we got chased by an out of control dog and her old owners used to only feed her organic carrots #fancy.  

Having some summer fun















Baby Nacho -not black and white!

Harvey
Next I'll tell you a little something about Nacho and Harvey, but just a little something because I've blogged about my cats a few times now.  Harvey is an ex obese, current diabetic.  Harvey used to be very fat, antisocial and he sacred me and so I payed him little attention.  We got Nacho - who was advertised as a black and white kitten - and he was so cute and I loved him.  Before moving out of my house for university I noticed Harvey had become skinny and sleepy, turns he had a bad case of the diabetes and since then hes been such a lovely cat!  Nacho was not too happy with us when we brought a puppy home with us to stay.  Nacho can be cute and cuddly when he feels like it, Harvey will cuddle in most of the time.  Harvey is too lazy to object.
Nacho now
he loves a hug















in da woods
Any finally, when I was in my final year of high school my mother decided to let us get a dog!  She decided we were getting a black lab which at first I was totally against but then I realised they were actually really cute! We travelled to the Scottish Borders to got visit a new little family of black lab puppies and fell in love and so as soon as he was of age to leave his mother we went to pic that little puppy up and bring him home.  None of us could agree on a name and so ultimately we let my grandad name him - he chose Riley after one of his classic cars.  Fun facts:  I often call him Boo Riley because I was ready To Kill A Mockingbird when we bought him, he loves shower time, he loves the cats even more and he thinks he's still small enough to sit on my knee - he is not!
Rocking his Christmas jacket




















So there you have it, that's my pets.  Currently we still have Riley and the cats.  The moral of the story is that if my pets were Finding Nemo character's they would not have one tentacle shorter than their other tentacles, they wouldn't be H2O intolerant... they'd be obnoxious!  Every last one of them.  In the best of ways
xoxo
Queen G

5 Times My Drunken Words Were Not Sober Thoughts

So there is a saying floating around that seems to be fairly regularly seen to be accurate and true.  This saying is "Drunken words are sober thoughts" or one of the various forms of this saying.  However as a 20 year old girl who does occasionally over indulge in alcoholic beverages I can honestly say that I have regularly not found that to be true.  Maybe that's because I am a full time truth exaggerator at the best of times but regardless, here are 5 times when I personally have found the above saying to be lies and slander.


I do love cats though.
1. Okay so the first time I ever got drunk it hit me like a thousand knifes stabbing me all over my body, I couldn't breathe, couldn't think.  At least, not about anything except how incredibly happy, free confused and lonely I felt.  However, during this night I also tried to tell everyone who would listen, with a fair amount of conviction, that I was and had always been a cat.  Now I may repeatedly fill my head with a whole lot of nonsense every day but I am 98% sure that sober G does not think she is a cat.  


2. I struggle to remember the last time I went on a night out as G.  As soon as the drinks start flowing the spirit of Blair Waldorf emerges from my soul.  Sometimes it resonates only in the form of me telling people on nights out that my name is Blair (Which I will admit, sometimes this is a sober thought).  Other time's I conduct a whole back story about how I lived in New York and how my father left my mother for a 31 year old model, a male model!  Back in the day I would frequently gather an audience, 2 vodka cranberry's into the night, and put on a performance of a lifetime to one of Taylor Swifts many smash hit singles.  Although sometimes I would do this for no reason other than I am partial to a little bit of spotlight and attention. From time to time, back in the day I would perform in order to prove to this audience that I was in fact the on and only Pennsylvania born and raised, guitar strumming songstress.  Much like the cat thing I would also tell people a whole bunch of fun facts about Tay myself and inform them of all the struggles I endured on my journey to becoming a musical sensation!

3. I also have a tendency to do a little exaggeration from time to time after a night out on the town.  For example I may or may not have told L that I was so hungry that if she didn't buy me a chicken burger I was going to die from starvation!  I also may have told her I had broken my toe or else along those lines... In reality it was a tiny cut.


My life in a meme
4.  I have also told a countless amount of people while I'm drunk that I've met Lorde and that she is far sillier in real life than you'd first imagine... I can't honestly say that this ever crossed my mind while sober.  In fact I think I've grown to have a greater appreciation for Lorde now because of the amount of times I told people I loved her when I was drunk when in reality back then I had no opinion of her.

5. And finally I've told so many people that I study film and media when I've been drinking... fun fact: I don't study film and media.

So to summaries.  Either because I am a sober compulsive liar or for some totally different reason I can honestly say that I do not believe you should think of anything that drunken people say to you as their sober thoughts.